huh what

[noabsolutes]

okay I fixed my nook and now I am bored so I am looking at free books I can get. Gee I wonder why this one is for free:

Events manager Sylvie Smith is organizing a glittering fund-raising event: a wedding show in a stately home. She has even been roped into pretending to be a bride...a bride who's five months pregnant! The bride everyone is talking about! It should be every girl's dream to design a wedding with no expense spared, but it's not Sylvie's. Longbourne Court was her ancestral home, and she's just discovered that the new owner is Tom McFarlane-her baby's secret father. Now Tom's standing in front of her, looking at her bump....

The real mystery tbh is why 653 people gave it an average rating of 4.5 stars out of 5.

Comments

[reservoir.livejournal.com]

lmao what, that doesn't even make any sense. I mean these writers really need to learn how to stop writing terrible self-insert books about all of their weird wish fulfillment fantasies

Don't worry, I once read some terrible softcore porn book about a writer (of course) fleeing to some guy's mountain home in Colorado (some friend of hers told her to stay there) to work on her next book or something where he started spying on her via his many hidden cameras, then sending her lingerie and sex toys and they end up happy ever after

I mean is this really worse

[mythrai.livejournal.com]

O____________________________x

[noabsolutes.livejournal.com]

I once was driving through a kind of crummy part of town near where I grew up and there was a book in the middle of the road, so I did what felt like the COOLEST THING I HAVE EVER DONE IN MY LIFE which was pop the door open, slow down, and grab the book as I rolled down the [deserted] street [at like 5 mph] grabbed the book, and kept on going without stopping

turned out to be a KMart romance novel (did not know they had those) and o snap I just found it on amazon for a fucking penny

the first 40 pages were about this secretary having a ~realization~ that she was in love with her boss, it was so excruciating I never even got to the dirty bits

[reservoir.livejournal.com]

Goddammit I am trying to remember what this book was called but all I can recall are the horrifying details so what I am trying to google with is making me really embarrassed

"erotic romance colorado sex toys spying" oh fucking dear

[noabsolutes.livejournal.com]

i just remembered Sons of Caitlin Bravo and went from there

i would love to see the results you're seeing but i am on a public connection SOOOOOOOOOOO... no.

[hydrogen-atom.livejournal.com]

What the fuck kind of horrible shit is this.

I mean I read the synopsis posted on the website but reading it here now makes it just seem EVEN MORE HORRIBLE.

[mythrai.livejournal.com]

compared to the hot mess of a plot the synopsis is describing, this is relatively minor but my brain is sort of rebooting when it tries to compare "Smith and McFarlane" to stately ancestral home

[noabsolutes.livejournal.com]

i have got to start writing romance novels in my spare time, if this sort of trip gets 653 people to read it

on the other hand, maybe they read it because it is totally free

[mythrai.livejournal.com]

Seriously! writing: if smeyer can do it, anyone can.

[noabsolutes.livejournal.com]

I've written some shit I'm actually proud of (lol WoW fanfiction, how can anyone be proud of you) but I am way better at short vignettes than like. plots.

[mythrai.livejournal.com]

lol girrrrl I am the last person to judge WoW vignettes :3

[noabsolutes.livejournal.com]

okay well i mean but you're fucking good at it lol, THERE'S A DIFFERENCE IN MY BRAIN

[mythrai.livejournal.com]

that was really good :x and sad :C

[ilaniel.livejournal.com]

There is no shame in WoW fanfiction! None! I <3 u. And I liked that little vignette! :3

Also wtf that synopsis in your OP I don't even know what it is talking about. SENSE, WRITER, LEARN TO FUCKING MAKE SOME!

[dativesingular.livejournal.com]

QQQ ACCESS IS DENIED D:

[noabsolutes.livejournal.com]

sec, fixing

[noabsolutes.livejournal.com]

work now?

[elialshadowpine]

o.O

Argh people quit giving the romance genre a bad name PLEAAAASE.

Seriously, wtf!?

[tediousandbrief.livejournal.com]

Eeek! That does sound like a terrible premise!

Maybe I should rethink this getting of an ereader....(i'm still not sold on it 100%)